The press conference was starting about 10 minutes late.  There had been a mention of a meeting with a legal team running over.  Wheels owner Mitch Ryder finally stepped to the microphone, looking a bit disheveled and wearing dark sunglasses.

“Thanks for coming, we are looking forward to our new season.  But do you know what really gets me?  Those West End Dogs, they’re using my songs.  That’s why our meeting just ran over, they’re using my songs, they owe me some serious royalties!  They’re using my songs, WHY IF I GET MY HANDS ON THEM I’LL…”

A whine and loud thud were heard as the microphone was switched off and Ryder was escorted away from the press conference.  Ryder could be heard continuing to rant as he walked away.  After a couple of minutes the microphone was switched back on as Wheels General Manager Al Kaline stepped to the microphone.  Looking a little bit dejected, Kaline spoke calmly to the assembled media.

“Thank you all again for coming to our preseason press conference.  On behalf of the organization I apologize for Mr. Ryder’s reaction, he’s been a bit preoccupied lately with this particular legal issue.  We have been trying to distract him by calling more meetings about the team, but he continues to be extremely concerned about that one issue.

“Anyway, the rest of us are certainly looking forward to the upcoming season.  You know, someone, I forget who, called us ‘the best last place team in the league’ last season.  I’m not sure how to take that, I guess sort of a compliment.  We were in a tough division though and did show an overall record better than even we might have hoped for.  It was good that we were able to move some players who were a bit disgruntled, rightly so perhaps, it was not possible to get Pujols, Fielder and Roidriguez in the lineup at the same time, at least in most of our games since the team was moved from the DH to the non-DH conference.

“We are glad to continue to have a strong ‘up the middle’ defense, with Wieters at catcher, Crawford and LeMahieu in the infield, and Maybin in center.  Maybin is currently struggling with some nagging injuries though, so we are a bit worried about that.  Pujols finally settles in as the regular first baseman rather than the rotating situation we had early last year, and Jake Lamb looks ready to take over as the regular third baseman.  Adam Eaton looks ready to take over as our regular right fielder, and we’re optimistic about Alex Dickerson growing into the left field job.

“Pitching-wise we felt we were a little thin so we put more focus on that in this last draft.  Wainwright and Roark look like they’ve rebounded from last year’s injury problems and we are glad to add Junior Guerra.  Colby Lewis looks like he might struggle with some injuries this year though.  We are optimistic that the bullpen can be a strength especially with Roberto Osuna closing things out.

“Thanks again for coming and here’s to a new season.”